Season 2[]
"Anyone notice I grew antlers?" -A Simple Christmas
"There you are! I was beginning to think you didn't want to see me!" -A Simple Christmas
"I think I can get Mike to do the skit this year." -A Simple Christmas
Season 3[]
"I can go with you." -Thanksgiving III
"Hey, Mike!" -Thanksgiving III
"They've gone crazy!" -Thanksgiving III
Season 4[]
"I don't think she likes me." -Thanksgiving IV
Mike: "Your health okay?"
Tag: "Pissing like a Teenager again." -From Orson with Love
"I'm telling you Mike there's no such thing as a bad baked potato. Any man that tells you differently is a jackass" -From Orson with Love
"Mexicans, sweetest people you'll ever meet." -From Orson with Love
"Always release a test fart if you can." -From Orson with Love
"Without your feet, ya got nothing. Your feet are the-the hands of your legs." -From Orson with Love
Season 5[]
"That reminds me of a story." -The Drop Off
"I'm throwing you balls and you're wiffling!" -Thanksgiving VI
"I gambled away all our cruise money!" -Thanksgiving VI
"Remember that story you were telling me, Mike about that honeymoon couple that got lost on a cruise and all they found was a flip-flop?" -Thanksgiving VI
Season 6[]
Mike: "You should stop."
Tag: "Yeah, it's getting late."
Mike: "No, you should stop, like for forever." -Flirting with Disaster
"If you don't help me, I'll fail my driver's test!" -Flirting with Disaster
"I was thinking we could come here every Tuesday and talk." -From Orson with Love
"I put this together so that you could hear my stories anytime!" -From Orson with Love