The Middle Wiki

- Welcome to the home of all things related to The Middle from the Polyurethane Cow to the Pioneer Galaxy Mall!

READ MORE

The Middle Wiki
Register
Advertisement

Season 2[]

Mike: "What happened?"

Rusty: "Ah, you know, the economy."

Mike: "The economy burned down your house?" -Thanksgiving II

"Here, I'll handle this. Kids, I want to give you a piece of advice from my own life: if you're going to smoke, don't do it face-down on a pillow." -Thanksgiving II

Season 3[]

"Coffee and cigarettes are bad for you. I'm going to do both, but let that be a lesson" -The Play

Mike: "Rusty's getting married."

Big Mike: "So your hitched, huh? Any toaster on the second floor is yours."

Rusty: "See Mike? Now that's how you congratulate a guy." -The Wedding

"That's what families are for: houses and kidneys" -The Wedding

Mike: "You didn't even show up at my wedding."

Rusty: "It wasn't at my house." -The Wedding

Season 4[]

Mike: "Good! You've gotten a head start."

Rusty: "No, I'm just catching up on my news. Regan died, you know." -Christmas Help

Season 5[]

Rusty: "Morning, Mike!"

Mike: "What are you doing?"

Rusty: "I'm using your hose water to brush my teeth."

Mike: "I get that, but why?"

Rusty: "I had a cavity on my last checkup, so I thought I shouldn't let up on the oral hygiene just because I'm living in my car."

Mike: "You're living in your car? Why don't you come in?"

Rusty: "Oh, I don't want to be a bother." -Heck on a Hard Body

Mike: "What's all this?"

Rusty: "It's my new buisness, NFL shower curtains."

Mike: "And you got permission from the NFL?"

Rusty: "Yes, yes, no but I found a way around it. It's a proven scientific fact that your eyes just fill in the missing letters."

Mike: "The New York Gants? Cincinati Begals?" -Heck on a Hard Body

Season 6[]

Rusty: "Well, you told me Jesus didn't love me. That one hurt because all the kids at Sunday school always said, 'Jesus loves me.' So I thought, 'Man this Jesus guy loves everybody. What's his beef with me?'"

Mike: "Wow, Rusty I'm sorry.

Rusty: "There was this one time you locked me in the closet all night. And I cried, and you said if I didn't stop crying, then Bobby Sherman would kill our mom.

Mike: "Bobby Sherman the singer?"

Rusty: "Yeah."

Mike: "Why would you believe that Bobby Sherman the singer was gonna kill mom?"

Rusty: "Because I believed everything you told me. Like, remember in high school? I wanted to be a meteorologist, But you told me my body would look womanly against the weather map." -Operation Infiltration

"Now, when I'm at a bar, I won't have to ask women to go back to the tire room. Now I can ask them to come back to my boyhood room. And if they think that's weird, I'll just tell them 'It's okay. My mom's dead.'" -Operation Infiltration

Season 8[]

"Now, listen. I got something that'll solve this whole deal. We send all the old people to war. We need somebody to fight the wars, and old people, they need something to do. They're gonna die soon anyway. This way, they go out with a real sense of purpose." -Hoosier Maid

Advertisement